I want to love winter. I want to love it so much. There are aspects I do love, like the soft feeling of a new jumper, and the feeling of cold, crisp air on a beautiful sunny day. It’s just there’s so much of winter that I reeeeally struggle with.
Firstly? The dark. I’m not afraid of the dark, but in England, winter has a tendency to consist of wet, dreary days that perpetually look like 6pm after the sunset when the excitement is all gone, and I really can’t get on board with that. I’m like the WALLE robot, I just live for the sun. Summer comes back around and the sun might appear, and I’m all too happy to sit on the ground and recharge.
The second thing? The short days. In my mind, the dark is for sleeping, and the light is for being awake, so to have short dark days is a bummer for my productivity. Again, here in England, we end up with days that are less than 8 hours long and nights over 16 hours long. My ideal is the direct opposite: 16 hour days, 8 hour nights!
That’s actually the reason I invested in this expensive alarm clock I’ve been using since February – it’s the Bodyclock, and it’s basically invented for people who suffer from SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder). I’m not being sponsored to say this, it’s just an honest opinion, but the difference between waking up before using this clock and after was just indescribable.
Essentially, it’s a nightlight. But it’s a programmable one, so you can set it for a ‘sunset’ where the light slowly dims for 20, 30, or 45 minutes until it’s completely dark; then there’s the ‘sunrise’ where the light gradually turns on for 20, 30 or 45 minutes before the time you want to get up. The idea is actually scientific – it emits blue light, which is what triggers your brain to wake up in the mornings, lifting you out of deep sleep so that when your noise alarm goes off you’re technically already awake. So, here’s hoping this winter is easier than last!
I see people everywhere who love the winter feeling, and the run down to Christmas. And in all fairness, that part is fun when I can put aside the feeling of dread about the idea that as we enter December, there are still about another four months I have to get through before I can feel energetic again.
Plus, sometimes I feel like winter here is a bit of a slap in the face. Seriously, if the weather is going to all the bother of stuffy clouds and plunging temperatures, the least it could do would be to actually snow. Not that crappy sleet-type-thing that falls at 10am and is gone by 11am, but the type of snow everyone waits for, that gives you a real white Christmas, or gives kids a day off school, and means you can create a proper snowman and have a real snowball fight.
And for all you people who live for the Starbucks and Costa winter drinks, and all of their flavoured coffees, and gingerbread this, pumpkin that – good for you! But I can’t drink those because I can’t drink caffeine. I’ve yet to venture into the world of decaffeinated drinks because I’ve never yet tried a hot drink I liked other than hot chocolate.
So yeah, I really want to love winter. I wish I could. But all the colour seems to drain out of life for a good proportion of the year for me, and my biology just hates it. I’m not programmed to deal with sunless cold and claustrophobic clouds. I’ll try to make the most of the fairy lights, the Christmas spirit and the feeling of joy that styling an outfit with a beanie provides, but I doubt winter will ever be my favourite season.